Chicken Math Is Real: How I Went From 4 Hens to 12 Without Even Trying
- leslie3170
- Apr 23, 2025
- 4 min read
It all started with a totally unplanned trip to Atwood’s—dangerous territory for someone like me. I had no intentions of becoming a chicken owner that day, but the moment I heard the chorus of baby chicks chirping, I was hooked. I brought home four: two Rhode Island Reds and two New Hampshire Reds. I had no plan, no setup, no experience—just a soft spot for anything cute and fluffy. And just like that, the spiral began.
This is also the same Atwood’s where I took home a puppy from someone selling them in the parking lot. Yeah. I’m a sucker.
With zero chicken knowledge, I put together a basic indoor setup, which—unsurprisingly—lasted about a week before I realized I needed these chicks out of my house, fast. That’s when the research began. Hours and hours of it. I started planning, my husband started building, and I figured that would be that.
But then I learned about colored eggs. Cue the second wave of birds. I saw Easter Eggers at Atwood’s (again) and snatched them up. Who wouldn’t want blue or green eggs, right? Then I saw some “limited time only” Cream Legbars with gorgeous pictures of the hens. Into the cart they went. And then… a few more. I couldn’t even tell you the breed of those last ones—I just knew I had to have them.
Suddenly, I had 12 birds.
And no real coop.
The Chicken Math Spiral is Real
They call it chicken math, and let me tell you: chicken math is real. You start with a few birds, and before you know it, you’re calculating space in your yard, your feed bill triples, and you’re wondering how on earth you got here. I was making excuses to swing by Atwood’s just to “look”—which, as any chicken keeper knows, is code for “bring home at least two more.”
Feed store impulse control? Gone. Budget? Out the window. Self-restraint? Nonexistent.
It wasn’t just about the eggs anymore—it was about collecting breeds like Pokémon. Each new chicken offered a new egg color, a new personality, or just plain cuteness. I told myself I was being “diverse” with my flock, but really I was just knee-deep in chicken math denial.
It wasn’t easy. Without a proper setup, I felt like I had to babysit these birds all day. I didn’t have designated space for their run, their food and water system wasn’t efficient, and my coop situation was barely functional. I was constantly adjusting heat lamps, cleaning out a tote in our garage nearly every day, dealing with constant overheating issues in a brooder I bought that claimed it could hold 20 birds—but in reality, was barely suitable for 5—and discovering pasty butt firsthand—something I didn’t even know existed until I saw it for myself. Eventually, we moved them into a pretty big tinhorn laid on its side with wire over the top, just to keep them from flying out.
But I loved them. I still do. Even though I only have one of those original 12 left (a story for another day), they taught me a lot about patience, boundaries, and restraint. Okay, maybe not the last one. But definitely about space planning.
The Lesson: Start With the Right Setup
If I had just slowed down and focused on getting the setup right the first time, it would have been a totally different experience. Chickens really are fun, they make great pets, and there’s nothing like collecting your own eggs. But when the excitement takes over and your infrastructure can’t keep up, it turns into a full-time job.
I was dealing with overcrowding, figuring out how to separate birds that weren’t getting along, and scrambling to find better housing solutions while my husband and I adjusted the coop build day by day to keep up with how fast things were evolving.
That’s why I always tell people now: start with the coop. A good setup makes chicken keeping enjoyable. A poor one? Let’s just say, you’ll be googling how to predator-proof a cardboard box while trying to clean pine shavings out of your carpet.
If I’d had a proper outdoor coop with the space and functionality we have now—a beautiful, thoughtfully built setup that actually works—I probably would’ve stopped at six birds. (Okay, maybe eight. But still.)
Final Thoughts:
Chicken math might be unavoidable—but chicken chaos isn’t. If you're thinking of starting a backyard flock, my advice is simple: plan your coop first, then pick your chicks. You'll save time, money, and sanity.
And maybe stay away from Atwood’s for a while. Or at least don’t bring a wallet.
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Stay tuned for the next story—like the time we went from 12 chickens… to just one. Because with chickens, there’s always another story.